"Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves." --Rainer Maria Rilke (©julenisse/Fotolia)

Monday, December 12, 2005

Heavenly Peace

Something strange has happened to me. Something very strange indeed. Save one or two last minute items, my Christmas shopping is finished--and I know what those last things are; I am just waiting for payday. Most of this shopping, in fact, was finished before Thanksgiving. I know there are people out there who always operate this way, but I have never been one of them. Historically, I procrastinate in every way. Not just at Christmastime, but for every project ever. That's the journalist in me... working well under the pressure of a looming deadline.

If I get Christmas cards out at all, it is usually after Christmas so that they are really Epiphany cards. Not this year. My cards are ready for mailing: stamped, addressed and bearing the required suburban family photo and holiday letter. Oh! And did I tell you? Those gifts I purchased are wrapped!

Trust me. I am not patting myself on the back. I am actually a bit concerned about what has gotten into me. It is a foreign concept for me to be ahead of the game. I fear I have been programmed by some force greater than myself.

I recently extricated myself from a situation/obligation/ albatross/community that has sucked the life out of me for years. Perhaps this is merely sanity. Is this the freedom and peace that comes when we take care of ourselves? When we draw a boundary? When we become mad as hell and decide we're not going to take it anymore? That in place of sheer hell is actually a slice of heaven?

Okay, I won't analyze it too much. Instead of trying to figure it all out, I will bake and have some friends in for a cup of Christmas cheer. I will enjoy it and be grateful. Thank you, Jesus! And Happy Birthday to you.

1 comment:

  1. Anonymous8:10 PM

    Procrastination - no sin or a crap tit [?]
    Sorry -- best anagram I ould come up on short notice.


Would love to hear from you! Due to spam, comments are moderated before publishing.